Friday, November 03, 2006

Mommy Guilt!

So Colin has decided that it's not OK for Mommy to leave the house if he is not coming too, and it's not OK for mommy to go upstairs or in the kitchen without him...Yesterday when I was leaving for work, he just cried and cried, pointing at me, saying "na-na-na" (that's Mama right now). Ryan booted me out the door after I gave him a kiss, telling me I would make it worse by prolonging the departure. Well needless to say I got into my car with tears coming down my face. And then last night I had a 5:30 staff meeting for my clinic job and he decided to do the same thing. Oh the guilt! I know every mother has experienced it and people tell you how awful it is, but until you experience it first hand you never really know how bad it can be! He obviously was OK two minutes after I left the house, but I kept thinking about it all day wondering if I had scarred him for life! I feel as though I am abandoning him...which I know I am not, but that's definitely how it feels. I am so grateful to be able to be home with him 2 days a week and I certainly have treasured every moment so far today...hopefully it will get better, I guess it's just a stage of development - normal right?????

2 comments:

Amy said...

Totally normal! Separation anxiety starts now and sometimes it gets worse before it gets better! Hang in there! Many mornings I leave for work with tears in my eyes still...as a working mom I totally understand! It's hard to juggle it all but your a great mom and thats what counts!!

James Michael said...

Oh Lisa..that is so hard I cannot imagine. I am sure Charlotte will go through separation anxiety and I will not be ready for it. Hang in there you're a wonderful mom and him not wanting you to leave is proof!